Tuesday, April 27, 2004

Osho's Quotes on "Relationship"

Buddha says the greatest joy in life is freedom: freedom from all prejudices, freedom from all scriptures, freedom from all concepts and ideologies, freedom from all desires, freedom from all possessiveness and jealousy, freedom from all hatred, anger, rage, lust... in short, freedom from everything, so that you are just a pure consciousness, unbounded, unlimited. That is the greatest joy, and it is possible -- it is within everybody's grasp. You just have to grope for it a little. The groping will be in the dark, but it is not far away. If you try, if you make an effort, you are bound to find it. It is your birthright.

The Dhammapada: The Way of The Buddha Vol. 6

An alive relationship is always changing. It has many climates, many moods. It has many surprises. A dead relationship remains stagnant. It is repetitive, it is the same, but then it is no more a relationship. Then you are not two persons, you are two things together. Of course two things never quarrel. The quarrel arises when two persons enter.

Darshan Diaries – A Rose Is A Rose

Be together but don't ask for absolute togetherness. Avoid the absolute; everything is relative. Be a little more free and your relationship can go a long way, mm? Because if you are not creating trouble for him and he is not creating trouble for you, then there is nothing to disturb your relationship.

Darshan Diaries – The 99 Names Of Nothingness

Each relationship is a mirror. It reflects you. How can you know yourself without the mirror? There is no way. Others' eyes become mirror-like, and when somebody loves you, that mirror is very, very sympathetic towards you; very, very happy with you; delighted with you. In those delighted eyes you are reflected and for the first time a certain acceptability arises.

Dang Dang Doko Dang

First be, then you can relate -- and remember, to relate is beautiful. Relationship is a totally different phenomenon; relationship is something dead, fixed, a full point has arrived. You get married to a woman; a full point has arrived. Now things will only decline. You have reached the limit, nothing is growing any more. The river has stopped and it is becoming a reservoir. Relationship is already a thing, complete; relating is a process. Avoid relationships, and go deeper and deeper into relating.

The Book Of Wisdom

No relationship can satisfy, because every relationship begins with great hope, and that is not possible to be fulfilled. Yes, that hope can be fulfilled, but it can be fulfilled only when you have fallen in love with the whole. No part can fulfill it. When you have fallen in love with the total, when the merger happens with the total, only then will there be contentment. There will be nobody who is contented, there will be simply contentment. And then there is no end to it.

The Book Of Wisdom

Every relationship is only an arrow towards the ultimate relationship; it is a milestone, it is not a goal. Every love affair is just an indication of a bigger love affair ahead -- just a little taste, but that little taste is not going to quench your thirst or satisfy your hunger. On the contrary, that little taste will make you more thirsty, will make you more hungry. That's what happens in every relationship. Rather than giving you contentment, it gives you a tremendous discontentment. Each relationship fails in this world -- and it is good that it fails; it would have been a curse if it was not so. It is a blessing that it fails.

The Book Of Wisdom

Relationship means something complete, finished, closed. Love is never a relationship; love is relating. It is always a river, flowing, unending. Love knows no full stop; the honeymoon begins but never ends. It is not like a novel that starts at a certain point and ends at a certain point. It is an ongoing phenomenon. Lovers end, love continues. It is a continuum. It is a verb, not a noun. And why do we reduce the beauty of relating to relationship? Why are we in such a hurry? -- because to relate is insecure, and relationship is a security, relationship has a certainty. Relating is just a meeting of two strangers, maybe just an overnight stay and in the morning we say goodbye. Who knows what is going to happen tomorrow? And we are so afraid that we want to make it certain, we want to make it predictable. We would like tomorrow to be according to our ideas; we don't allow it freedom to have its own say. So we immediately reduce every verb to a noun.

The Book Of Wisdom

Relationship is ugly, relating is beautiful. Relationship is one thing, interdependence totally another. Relationship means you are separate; you are independent and so is the other, and you decide to relate. Relationship is not interdependence, it is a contract between two independent persons. Hence all relationships are false, because basically independence is false. Nobody is independent -- and if you are not independent how can you relate? With whom can you relate?

The Book Of Wisdom

A musical oneness... such a deep love that it consumes your ego. There are not two persons in relationship but only a harmonious whole, an energy field.

Beyond Enlightenment

That must be the basic responsibility of every alert being: Before I move in any relationship I must be unburdened. I should not carry a hangover; only then can I help the other to grow. Otherwise I will exploit, and the other will exploit me! Otherwise I will try to dominate and the other will try to dominate me. And it will not be a relationship, it cannot be love, it will be a subtle politics.

And The Flowers Showered

And we are so bothered about these things which are NOT. You are too bothered if you are ugly. You are too bothered if you are beautiful. The worry is created by something which is not. A relative thing is NOT. It is just a relationship, as if you have drawn a design in the sky, a flower of air. Even a bubble in water is more substantial than relativities. Who are you if you are alone? Nobody. Somebodiness comes in relationship with somebody.

And The Flowers Showered

But as you become more and more aware of MANY people, as you become related to many people, one thing becomes absolutely clear to you: that ALL men are alike -- almost alike -- so are all women. Then settling starts. Then you start settling with one woman, with one man, in a more intimate relationship.

Ah, This!

There are two types of relationship: one is of fight, fear, hatred -- this creates ego -- the other is of love, compassion, sympathy. These are the two types of relationship. Wherever love is, fight ceases, ego drops. This is why you cannot love. It is difficult, because to love means to drop the ego, to drop yourself. Love means not to be.

A Bird On The Wings

Between the friend and the enemy there is not much difference. With the friend your relationship is love-hate, and with the enemy, your relationship is hate-love. That's the only difference -- just the difference of emphasis. Love on top and hate hidden behind it -- it is friendship. Hate has come on top and love has gone behind it -- it is enmity.

I Say Unto You

I am against all kinds of relationships. For example, I don't like the word "friendship," but I love the word "friendliness." Friendliness is a quality in you, friendship again becomes a relationship.

The Hidden Splendour